Where the wild things are

Something peed by my front door during the night. A little puddle of wet that smells most funkily of wee in the corner of the porch-ette. And this comes a mere couple of weeks after something left a very sloppy poo on the doormat. I suspect foxes – you can hear them screeching in the night, copulating in the road – my upstairs neighbour leaves cat biscuits out by her door, but it’s the foxes that eat them. Then shit on my doormat. I kind of expect it in the back garden, where the neighbourhood mogs crap on the lawn and attempt to ‘fertilise’ the flower beds, but I do object to having to check when I step outside in the morning.

Especially as I don’t really wake up until about 11am.


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