Things that have made me laugh heartily in the last 24 hours

One-liners on the back of Smoke:

  • "…and then we planted some hegemonies, but they just took over the whole garden" – Chelsea Flower Show panel floored by surreal lady in smock from Penge
  • "I may have the body of a weak and feeble woman" – Smithfield butcher responds warily to enquiry about contents of freezer

You should buy Smoke. Before they stop making paper versions altogether, which sounds like it's happening soon.

From Simon Amstell's new sitcom:

"The cat didn't make me any less lonely. It just became a mascot for my loneliness."

From That Mitchell and Webb Look:

"Don't worry, it's totally normal. It doesn't make you the sort of freaky, long-fingernailed loner who gets arrested in Sainsburys for stroking the bread. Being shit with people is just a very minor disability that you share with everyone who isn't Alan Carr or Top Cat."


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