Actor crush

You know the principle behind an actor crush. It’s when you’ll watch anything a particular actor is in just because you admire their talent.

Roger Allam
Rory Kinnear
Ruth Wilson
Benedict Cumberbatch (I think I only fancy him as Sherlock, which says something either about me and brunettes or me and sociopaths)
Stephen Rea
Michael Sheen
Emma Thompson
Jim Broadbent
Russell Tovey

And then are just crushes. These actors are still incredibly good but I also, well, would:

Alan Rickman
Matt Smith (moved into this category after watching The Doctor’s Wife)
Jamie Parker
Rafe Spall
Sam Rockwell

You may notice no David Tennant in either of these lists. Oh, David. What are we going to do about you? My actual crush began to be ground out of existence by the gradual metamorphosis of the Doctor into someone who could only communicate through his bottom teeth, and was dealt a final blow on the day I realised DT’s girlfriends were getting younger and blonder in direct proportion to his fame.

But he’s still a good actor, right? Remember Casanova, remember the final third of Waters of Mars? Remember Blackpool, He Knew He Was Right, Bright Young Things? And my god, he was good in Hamlet, wasn’t he? Yes, but… the latest of those is about 18 months ago. And since then? The evidence for the prosecution racks up, m’lud.

St Trinian’s 2
Rex is Not Your Lawyer
Single Father – which was OK, but rather heavy on the schmaltz
What’s this – Fright Night? A remake of a 1980s horror movie? Are you freaking kidding us?

All this could have been forgotten, Davey, with one magnificent, sweeping, Shakespearean rush of Benedick. And what happened? Someone – I don’t know who – decided that, instead of letting Tennant and Catherine Tate show their undoubted range, they’d turn Much Ado About Nothing into T&T Do Slapstick All Over The Dialogue. That a star vehicle would be a much better idea than putting some thought into how to deal with the many problems that Shakespeare left for us (for all the man’s supposed genius, he created a sub-plot – Claudio and Hero – that nobody gives a shit about, and a villain I could undo in half a day). That it would be alright not to have the other actors pause while the audience laugh at Tennant’s antics in the gulling scene, but just carry on with their lines unheard, because this is definitely not an ensemble piece. And it doesn’t work. Star power doesn’t automatically create a good play, and I’m surprised that both Tennant and Tate were evidently OK to let it happen. I don’t think I’ve ever been more disappointed after spending 40 quid.

David Tennant’s presence alone will no longer convince me to watch something. I can’t trust his judgement of quality. At the moment the only decent thing he seems to be doing is voice work. I’m very concerned.


One response to “Actor crush

  1. Kate June 24, 2011 at 4:20 pm

    This has just reminded me to email you about the very libellous thing I heard about DT. Not that I’m about to email you. Oh no.

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